U.S. Open Men's Final 

Sunday, September 13
Admission: Free, $10 minimum
Showtime: 4pm
reservations are recommended

We meant to have the Women's Final as well, but another event pre-empted our "coverage". But, we will forge forward with the men's version.

It may or may not involve Roger Federer or Rafael Nadal, but whoever Arthur Ashe and the tennis gods chooose they will not be topless.